American Idol Week 4 - Cougar Town?

Holy eyebrows batman!!

Last night Jimmy and Friends showcased the legendary Stevie Nicks whom, i believe, was completely out of her mind on drugs.  She certainly proved to be a cougar, hunting young wild game as she was whispering sweet nothings to Phillip and the other male contestants.  She also was dressed like my 72 year old aunt. Oh wait, thats right.  This is because she is like 72. 





Tommy Hilfiger does his fashion shmeal again. My wife asked "Do people still even wear Tommy?"  I really don't know the answer to this.  Apparently. Here is a coupon if you need one. 

The contestants were to sing their own songs this week.  Everyone, minus a couple, had phenomenal performances.  Why?  Because they were able to pick a song they wanted to sing and weren't forced to sing irrelevant artists like Stevie Wonder and Billy Joel. No offense to them.. they are fantastic singers but that was like 40 years ago.  Its 2012 not 1975!!

Colton  sang a Lifehouse song.  I don't know it nor the name.  Prior, Stevie has a moment with colton's hair. I swear i think she took some of his strands and masterbated to it later on at her home.  I felt that, for the first time, i have some negative things to say about Colton.  Stop booing me people.   I felt the song was sooooo boring.  He sang it great, at some parts.  I felt the beginning was so slow and boring and a little pitchy. It took like 5 minutes for the build up and then it sounded great. But that beginning part killed me.  Regardless, I will still work for Colton.  My grade B+  Would have gotten an A but he cried after he was done singing.  TOTALLY NOT COOL.   


Side note - What was up with Randy's outfit.  He was dressed to impress for Mardi Gras with his Mardi Gras beads around his neck OR for a bachelorette party, perhaps those were mini penises around his neck.  Nobody will ever know. 


Skyler sang something country.. once again i have no idea how to judge this.  The crowd liked it.  I guess she sounded good.
My grade - NA

Real Country song titles

Side note - during her trio performace with Holli and Jessica (who killed it by the way) she totally sounded like shit.  It was her first time not singing country and wow was it bad. Madonna was rolling in her grave.. oh wait she is not dead yet. 


Heejun sang Song For You and destroyed it.. in a good way.  It was pretty amazing. These are the kinds of songs that he was meant to sing.  None of that other crap.  His voice has such a nice sound to it.  Will he be the start of the Asian Invasion!!  We shall see.  My grade A+




Side note - Jason derulo comes out advertising something about a song he is writing and a lucky fan of American Idol will help him finish.  Righhhht..  Because this is a good idea!  Somehow he broke his neck and was wearing a blinged out neck brace that probably cost more than my car. 

Hollie sang Jesus Take the Wheel by Carrie Underwood and makes Stevie cry during rehearsals. There was one point where i thought Stevie was going to try to make out with Hollie as she whispered sweet nothings to her very very close.  It was awkward.  God dam this song is sad.  She sounded great as always.  This beyotch is going far. My Grade A+


Deandre sang Sometimes I Cry by Eric Benet. Once again im showing that i am musically challenged as i never heard this song. Wasn't this the guy who was married to Halle Berry?
When Deandre started to sing, I myself, started to cry but in agony.  I had to lower the TV as the cats nearby began to gather around my window and start screaming.  There was a part in the song where my tv, no joke, paused the program and said.. please stop this.  I swear its true.  I think a couple of my expensive Crystal broke from the high pitch squeals. Somehow, the judges gave a standing ovation.  Maybe because he was done singing?? That's all i can think. Seriously, I did NOT like it at all. Jlo pleads to the audience to vote for Deandre because she wants to hear this voice more.. ummm.. just google cats in heat..or better yet I will save you the time.  Just watch this video to get an idea of what Deandre sounds like.  My grade - D

Jessica sang Sweet Dreams or a Beautiful Nightmare from Beyonce.  Holy good golly miss molly this was phenomenal.  I think this girl can sing the phonebook!  cricket cricket .  I got goosies all over my body including my temples. How is that possible.  She did a great job with it.  Really cool version and excellent stage production. The judges stand for Deandre but not for her. What gives?  My grade - A+


Phillip sang Still Rainin' by Johnny Lang.  I dont know the man or the song.  During rehearsals, Stevie has another need-to-change-my-wet-depends moment again when Phillip sings to her. She tells him that he would have been asked to join Fleetwood Mac.  Christ on a pony!  What is it with people and this guy.  He sounded good the first couple times i heard him. Now he just sounds like he is singing the same song last week and the week before. His name Phillip Phillips is perfect because every song is simply that.. a Phillip song.  Perhaps Im alone on this one, but to me, he sings in 1 range and stays there.  Then when he gets to the higher notes he shouts and makes all weird faces.  Perhaps this is cool because he is "feeling" the music. I dont know.  Doing this all the time makes you sound the same. At least to me.  My grade - C

Going for that high note?

Side note - I googled the song and played it.  He sounded identical to the original.  Based on this, I would say it was good. But again, this sound to me is getting old. There is NO way i can listen to a full album of this. 


Joshua sang Without You by Mariah and killed it.  It was fantastic.  He got all Josh in the middle with his over the top yelling BUT it was incredible..  Dammmmmmmmmmm... somehow he starts crying in the middle and, once again, the judges stand. I threw my bra at the TV and yelled WITHOUT YOU!  My grade - A+




Elise finished the show by giving a fantastic performance of  Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin.  I am such a huge fan of this girl.  She is like the ugly duckling out of the bunch but man can she sing. She has come a long way and i think she found her way. Hopefully America keeps her around.  My grade - A+


Based on last nights performances the person i think should go home is Deandre or Skyler.  I felt that Skyler did NOT sing her song that well and her trio was horrendous.  At this point, everyone knows i am not a fan of Deandre.  However, unfortunately i have a feeling that Elise maybe going home.  She is like 30 and that is like 87 in American Idol years. America is not ready for an "old" idol. 

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